Tuesday, September 2, 2008

Product Review [unpaid]: Ninja Pen

If you are facing a need to prove that the pen is indeed mightier than the sword, you have two options:

1. Start writing frantically, hoping something honest and beautiful will emerge and that those who read it will be inspired and deem you a victorious literary badass.
2. Get a 13-in-1 pen and lay down the letter of your own law.

Here is what option #2 looks like, all spread out and displayed like a Pen Gone Wild shot:

The 13-in-1-multi pen or Ninja Pen as I think of it, is a twisty-turny, shuriken-shooting, blade-obfuscating piece of ninja awesomeness. Shuriken shooting?! Ok, maybe I got a little carried away. So, what's inside?

  • Ballpoint Pen (duh)
  • Hole Puncher (huh?)
  • Stainless Steel File (yeah)
  • Short Cutting Blade (hell, yeah)
  • Flat Screwdriver (1 million uses)
  • Wire Sleeve Remover (handy)
  • Small Nail Remover (fingernail?)
  • Ear Pick (not just for yourself)
  • Long Cutting Blade (not that long)
  • Tweezer (oooh!)
  • Philips Screwdriver (good for first impressions)
  • Stainless Steel Fork (great for camping... ok, maybe not)
  • Saw (why not?)

  • The only thing it's missing is a high powered green laser


    Unknown said...


    Look, if it doesn't have a high powered green laser, we might as well all pack up & go home.

    steenky bee said...

    Second! Um, I am laughing so hard at this! I also totally want this. I do a produce a lot of presentation materials at work and this would be handy for cutting large boards. Also, seriously, I work with a bunch of asshats so I could use it on them as well.

    Captain Dumbass said...

    Third! ...fuck, I got nothing. And I'm not even employed now, but still, I'd totally have that pen. And if it DID come with a green laser?! Oh ya...

    cIII said...

    I reckon a fella could use that Pen on his brand new Heelys. You know loads about good toys. Thanks SDN.