Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Who is Sleep Deprivation Ninja?

We're in the last bits of our weekly PEPS group meeting when I mention that my wife and I have discovered parent blogs and found them to be a good venue for commiseration and entertainment.

Sleep Deprivation Ninja: Some of the mommy and daddy blogs are hilarious and often they are brutally honest, which is a massive relief.

Solar Dancer: He has a blog. He's Sleep Deprivation Ninja.

SDN: ... *mumbles in a very un-ninja-like fashion*, *feigns modesty*

At home, we prepared Code Name Alice for bed.

Sleep Deprivation Ninja: I wasn't going to tell them who I am... I mean Lois Lane doesn't go around saying, 'Hey, Clark over there is Super Man'. Alfred probably doesn't tell his spa buddies that Bruce Wayne is Batman...

Solar Dancer: Um... those people are fictional, but I'm sorry...I won't tell anyone else.

SDN: Ah, don't worry about it. It's not a big deal, really. People can get that much info if they do a little digging. But I'm not worried about it. Sleep Deprivation Ninja is my alter ego, but I am also someone else's alter ego. So even if they know who I am, they will never truly know the identity of Sleep Deprivation Ninja.

SD: are you someone else's alter ego? Who are you really?

SDN: The truth is too much for anyone to know. But if they look deep, all they will find is that I am Sleep Deprivation Ninja's alter ego.

SD: Isn't that the same thing as Sleep Deprivation Ninja being your alter ego?

SDN: See, this is the great thing about it; I've hidden the truth in this infinite recursion thing. SDN is my alter ego and so I am SDN am I. You can't escape the regress unless you access a higher level of consciousness. I don't even know who I am beyond this mortal coil.

SD: I think people will be satisfied just knowing that you are Sleep Deprivation Ninja. I don't think they need to search out your metaphysical puppet master.

SDN: But then they still don't have the truth... I'm not really here. I don't exist.

Sleep Deprivation Ninja's alter ego begins to fade away, without identity, this flesh facade has no meaning. His body reaches half opacity when Solar Dancer shouts out.

SD: Don't you go vanishing on me. Baby needs a ninja daddy.

SDN: Oops... I'm disolving... sorry.

Sleep Deprivation Ninja regains full opacity. No matter his true identity. He is a daddy. He is a ninja.

This is all ye need know.


Jon said...

Infinite regress is sweet.

cIII said...

Ah. The Popeye Philosophy.
"I am what I am."
Spinach must make you wicked smart.

steenky bee said...

When ever I left the house as a teenager, my parents would always say "Don't forget who you are and what you stand for." What would SDN say? Hey, I could get a ring or bracelette made up for that -- WWSDND? (What Would Sleep Deprived Ninja Do?)

Captain Dumbass said...

I would totally wear that. It would have to be black, of course.

Mike said...

In a way we all are our alter egos on these blogs, because who hasn't changed a little thing here or a little thing there? That makes the online represenation of us a little different than the real us.

Hmm. Does that make sense? My brain hurts and not just because I've been listening to children's music.

Unknown said...

that would be awesome @jenboglass and, of course, the lettering would also have to be black. I should setup a Cafe Press store with a whole stock of black clothing that say pithy things in black letters.