Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Who is Sleep Deprivation Ninja?

We're in the last bits of our weekly PEPS group meeting when I mention that my wife and I have discovered parent blogs and found them to be a good venue for commiseration and entertainment.

Sleep Deprivation Ninja: Some of the mommy and daddy blogs are hilarious and often they are brutally honest, which is a massive relief.

Solar Dancer: He has a blog. He's Sleep Deprivation Ninja.

SDN: ... *mumbles in a very un-ninja-like fashion*, *feigns modesty*

At home, we prepared Code Name Alice for bed.

Sleep Deprivation Ninja: I wasn't going to tell them who I am... I mean Lois Lane doesn't go around saying, 'Hey, Clark over there is Super Man'. Alfred probably doesn't tell his spa buddies that Bruce Wayne is Batman...

Solar Dancer: Um... those people are fictional, but I'm sorry...I won't tell anyone else.

SDN: Ah, don't worry about it. It's not a big deal, really. People can get that much info if they do a little digging. But I'm not worried about it. Sleep Deprivation Ninja is my alter ego, but I am also someone else's alter ego. So even if they know who I am, they will never truly know the identity of Sleep Deprivation Ninja.

SD: are you someone else's alter ego? Who are you really?

SDN: The truth is too much for anyone to know. But if they look deep, all they will find is that I am Sleep Deprivation Ninja's alter ego.

SD: Isn't that the same thing as Sleep Deprivation Ninja being your alter ego?

SDN: See, this is the great thing about it; I've hidden the truth in this infinite recursion thing. SDN is my alter ego and so I am SDN am I. You can't escape the regress unless you access a higher level of consciousness. I don't even know who I am beyond this mortal coil.

SD: I think people will be satisfied just knowing that you are Sleep Deprivation Ninja. I don't think they need to search out your metaphysical puppet master.

SDN: But then they still don't have the truth... I'm not really here. I don't exist.

Sleep Deprivation Ninja's alter ego begins to fade away, without identity, this flesh facade has no meaning. His body reaches half opacity when Solar Dancer shouts out.

SD: Don't you go vanishing on me. Baby needs a ninja daddy.

SDN: Oops... I'm disolving... sorry.

Sleep Deprivation Ninja regains full opacity. No matter his true identity. He is a daddy. He is a ninja.

This is all ye need know.


Black Hockey Jesus said...

Infinite regress is sweet.

cIII said...

Ah. The Popeye Philosophy.
"I am what I am."
Spinach must make you wicked smart.

jenboglass said...

When ever I left the house as a teenager, my parents would always say "Don't forget who you are and what you stand for." What would SDN say? Hey, I could get a ring or bracelette made up for that -- WWSDND? (What Would Sleep Deprived Ninja Do?)

Captain Dumbass said...

I would totally wear that. It would have to be black, of course.

Mike said...

In a way we all are our alter egos on these blogs, because who hasn't changed a little thing here or a little thing there? That makes the online represenation of us a little different than the real us.

Hmm. Does that make sense? My brain hurts and not just because I've been listening to children's music.

Sleep Deprivation Ninja said...

that would be awesome @jenboglass and, of course, the lettering would also have to be black. I should setup a Cafe Press store with a whole stock of black clothing that say pithy things in black letters.